Tuesday May 28, 2019
When your kids are growing up in a household, the adults around provide them with role models for future behavior. Oftentimes, when you look at an adult’s failed relationships, the failure can be traced back to their role models and how they were brought up.
The relationships we develop as adults are often a mirror of the relationships we saw when we were growing up. If a child sees that you and your spouse don’t respect each other, then they are more likely to grow up not respecting their spouse.
Here’s how you can model healthy relationships for your children:
- Admit your mistakes—Often, especially when we are in the midst of a conflict or argument, we want to feel like we are right and the other person is wrong. Even if we realize that we’ve made a mistake, we become defensive and resist admitting this. This is your first big mistake when modeling positive relationships. Teach your children that admitting you are wrong is a sign of strength, not one of weakness. This will help them out as adults when they are able to say, “I was wrong. I’m sorry.”
- Explain your decisions—Another thing that you want to model for your children is that you are responsible for explaining why you do the things that you do. Simply saying, “Because I said so!” isn’t good parenting because it implies that you have no responsibility for your actions. Show your kids that being a good partner means making good, sound decisions.
- Don’t act from anger—One of the biggest skills you can teach your child is how to handle anger and stress. It’s important to show that you don’t lash out and do things simply because you are mad. Instead, show them how to “cool down.” Introduce them to stress management techniques such as deep breathing or meditation. This helps center you and shows your child how they should act when they are adults.
If you truly want to be your child’s greatest teacher, then show them one of the most important skills they can learn—the ability to get along well with others. Relationship skills are an often overlooked set of skills that you can model while they are young.