Tuesday April 3, 2018
No one could possibly think for a split second that motherhood is easy. In many ways, it is the ultimate job—the type that you are on call for every minute of every day. A job with the end result of another human being growing and thriving. But one of the main problems with motherhood is the level of pressure that is put on moms by outsiders who are often too judgmental. And if that wasn’t enough, there is also the sometimes insurmountable pressure that moms put on themselves.
Just think about what has happened with motherhood in the age of social media. If you post a picture on your Facebook or Instagram account, you are opening yourself to negativity from others. There are the body-shamers who may make comments about you or the way that you are feeding your child. There are others who will criticize how you are holding your baby. If you have a life after giving birth, this will cause people to challenge and criticize you. Musician John Legend even commented on the lack of “dad-shaming” because it is usually the mom who bears the brunt of these comments just as when his wife Chrissy Teigen was criticized for going out to dinner with Legend not long after giving birth.
We can also be our own worst critics. We build up this impossible image of what the perfect mom would look like or act like, and there is no way we could ever achieve these goals. Every time we make a choice or a decision, we are second-guessing ourselves wondering if this will damage our children or our relationship with them. This second-guessing gets in the way of our natural responses, which are often the best.
Ultimately, what the world needs now is more grace. We need to be more accepting of others and less critical, not only of those around us but on ourselves as well. It may be a cliché, but no one is perfect. We all make mistakes and can learn from them and move on from them. But we cannot do that unless we learn to let go of those foibles and if others will learn to do the same.
So let’s make it our mission together to give each other more grace. The world will be a better place for it!